Crazy With Desire
by lesipiratecat
Summary: Olivia's constant flirting has being driving Alex crazy. Finally losing her grip on her self-control, Alex decides that she can no longer wait to see if Liv's gonna make her move; she's going to have Olivia whether the detective is ready or not. M rating for f/f action, cursing, etc


Disclaimer: I do not own Law and Order: SVU or any of its characters. I just borrow them and make them do my bidding for my own amusement.

Note: I just want to say that crushing sleeping pills to mix in water is something you shouldn't try at home. From what I could find on the internet, it's not the worst thing you can do, but it's not great either. Some people think it works better than just swallowing them (especially if you have problems swallowing pills), but it can also be unsafe because, you know, chemicals and stuff and blah blah blah science stuff that I don't feel like repeating lol. (I swear I'm smart, I'm just lazy hahaha) And, obviously, the more sleeping pills you take/crush the more hazardous they get. SO, for the sake of the story just pretend that it is safe and/or know that Liv will suffer no ill effects from it. I don't want people to get all technical on me, so I figured I'd just put this out here before hand.

ALSO, as with most of my stories, this one is rated M for sexual content and cursing. Enjoy!

~~~~~SVU~~~~~

Alex couldn't help but stare at the detective from her place atop the other woman's desk. As she discussed over their recently closed case with her partner and the other two detectives, Alex let her mind wander to how sexy, how beautiful the brunette was; she drove Alex crazy with desire whenever she even thought about her. When they were around one another it was all Alex could do not to throw herself at the brunette and ravage her. Whether it was just lust or something more Alex couldn't decide, but she was sure Olivia felt it too. Their conversations were casual in an attempt to make their light touches and flirts seem like less than they were. Their arguments turned heated due to unreleased sexual frustration. Or at least, that's how Alex interpreted them. And the longer this went on, the more frustrated Alex grew. With all of Olivia's teasing touching and flirting, Alex was in a constant state of arousal. The only thing that made her forget about it, however briefly, was when she heard the gruesome details of a case. Even in court, she still would feel that constant throbbing between her legs whether Olivia was there watching or not. Alex was growing sick of it. No amount of thinking gross thoughts or masturbating at night could ease her ache, and she knew she had to do something about it sooner rather than later or she was in danger of losing her mind.

The sound of her name brought her out of her thoughts, and she looked up to see all four detectives and the Captain joking around about their latest perp's face when Alex tricked him into revealing his true self. Olivia stood up, grabbing her nearly empty cup of coffee, and lifted it. "To Alex!" she called.

The other three detectives grabbed their cups and lifted them while Cragen, who didn't have a coffee, just smiled at her proudly. "To Alex!" They repeated. Alex blushed and shook off their praise. Liv smiled widely and shouldered her gently. Alex smiled shyly at her. For a while, they stayed like that, gathered by their desks as they joked and laughed about anything that came to their minds. Soon, Elliot found himself doing a rather hilarious and accurate impression of Judge Petrovsky, causing everyone to nearly fall to the ground with laughter. All the while, Liv kept invading Alex's personal space. She would lean her side against Alex's, reach over and touch her hand, send her smoldering looks; it was driving Alex mad as her center throbbed and soaked her panties. Alex shook minutely as she struggled to maintain her grip on her self-control. Finally, Elliot looked at his watch and said it was time for him to head home. Everyone agreed that it was getting rather late and decided to call it a night. As they gathered their things and started to walk to the exit, Cragen called after them to have a goodnight and to take a three day weekend. The three men cheered and high-fived one another. Olivia did her best to look happy but Alex could see the disappointment in her eyes. She knew how much Liv hated not going to work, especially if it meant she was just going to sit at home bored and alone. Suddenly Alex got an idea, a very evil, delicious idea, and she smiled evilly to herself before hiding it so no one would see. Once outside, they all said their goodbyes and headed their separate ways. Alex waited until the men were out of earshot to call after Olivia, "Olivia! Wait up a second!"

Olivia stopped and turned around to wait for the blonde. Alex ran up to her and said, "You heading home?"

Liv shrugged, "Guess so. Got nowhere else to be."

Alex cheered in her head. "Want to come to my place instead?"

"You sure? Isn't it kinda late? And don't you have work tomorrow?"

"Nope! Liz gave me a long weekend too. So what do you say?"

Liv grinned, "I say sure. Let's go."

Alex linked her arm with Liv's and walked her along until they got a taxi. She gave the driver her address, her heart beginning to beat faster as she got closer and closer to initiating her plan. Her panties were already ruined, were so wet that they were sticking to her, and they were only getting wetter. Alex licked her lips at the thought of finally having what she wanted. The more she thought about it, the more she had to tell herself to wait a little longer. By the time they made it to her door, Alex was breathing shallowly. She did her best to steady her shaking hand enough to unlock and open her door. "I'm sorry to say it but I haven't got any beer. Why don't you go sit on the couch and I'll get us some water?" Alex said smoothly.

"Okay. Shall I put something on the TV?" she asked, walking towards the living room.

"Sure! Whatever you want!" Alex called as she headed into the kitchen. Moving quickly and silently, she opened the cabinet that held her meds. She riffled through them until she found what she was looking for. Sleeping pills. She remembered that time Olivia stayed with her when she had the stomach flu. Alex had loved taking care of her, making sure she stayed hydrated and holding her hair as she vomited repeatedly into the toilet. Sure it hadn't been pretty, but Alex had liked being the one to take care of the normally independent detective. When the worst of it finally passed, Alex had given her a few sleeping pills to help her sleep as long as she could so she could recover. At the time, Alex had only given her one at a time, but Liv had already been weak from being sick. She decided three would be enough this time around. Quickly, as quietly as she could, she smashed the pills into powder. Then she grabbed a glass and filled it with water before sliding her hand over the counter to push the dust into the glass. She stirred it to make sure there was no sign of the dust, Alex grabbed both glasses and moved back into the living room. Liv looked up at her and smiled warmly, reaching for the glass. Alex watched as she gulped down half of it. Then she sat next to her friend, leaning against her side and resting her head on her shoulder, as she waited for the pills to take effect.

~~~~~SVU~~~~~

Olivia's eyes blinked open. Instantly she was filled with confusion. She didn't remember falling asleep. And she definitely didn't remember falling asleep in Alex's bedroom. Had she really been that exhausted? She didn't think so. If she had been, she would've said no to Alex's invitation to go to her place. So why was the last thing she remembered her and Alex sitting on her couch watching TV? How did she get into Alex's bed? And… What the hell? How did she end up NAKED? "Alex?" she croaked tiredly as she tried to sit up. She was met with resistance on her wrists and fell backwards. What the fuck? She looked up. How the hell did she end up cuffed to Alex's bed? With her own fucking cuffs! Why? She panicked and began to pull against her restraints. She fought with her whole body only to find that her ankles were tied too. One to each corner of the bed, forcing her legs open. She vaguely realized that her lower half was covered with one of Alex's sheets, but it wasn't nearly comforting enough. "Alex?" she called, still struggling. A voice by the door captured her attention.

"Oh. You're awake," Alex purred as she leaned against the door frame.

Olivia's thrashing paused as she couldn't help but gape at Alex. The blonde was wearing nothing but a pair of black lacy panties and Olivia's black leather jacket. It was hanging open just enough to reveal part of her small but perky breasts, covering her nipples. Her flat stomach and long, gorgeous legs however were in full view. Despite the situation, Olivia felt a surge of heat and wetness between her legs; Alex looked really fucking good in nothing but panties and her jacket. She swallowed roughly, forcing herself to get back to the real issue here. She ripped her eyes from Alex's body and looked into her eyes. That didn't help much seeing as Alex's eyes were wandering over her hungrily, passionately, possessively. When those blue eyes looked up to find Liv's, Alex's mouth smirked as her eyes flashed with desire and arousal. Olivia felt a pleasant shiver rush up her spine, igniting her core and kick starting her heart beat, at the wanton gaze. She felt like she was a gourmet platter laid out for Alex to devour, like a juicy-looking mouse under a cat's stare. And like prey, she was helpless to escape it or Alex herself. Olivia realized she rather liked it. Maybe a little too much. She was glad Alex couldn't see her now-surely-soaked folds. '_No,_' she told herself. '_This isn't right. You have to get out of this._' She gulped and inhaled deeply before demanding as strongly as she could, "Alex. What the hell is going on?" She reprimanded herself internally when her voice came out shakier than she'd wanted.

Alex grinned ferally, "What's going on Olivia is I got tired of you teasing and flirting with me and never doing anything about it. All the touches, the invading of my personal space, the looking at me with that wanting, sexy, seductive look were driving me crazy. I've been permanently horny for God knows how long because of you. I. Cannot. Take it. Anymore."

Olivia's eyes widened at the confession. She had known that there was something between her and Alex. There had been for a long time. Alex wasn't wrong saying that Olivia flirted with her a lot, but she hadn't realized it had gotten so bad. She must look at and touch Alex more often than she thought. It was just second nature to her now to be close to the blonde she was so attracted to, something she needed and just subconsciously did sometimes. Truth was it drove Liv crazy too; she would always get aroused whenever she saw Alex, whenever Alex would sit on her desk while Liv was sitting in her chair, whenever Alex wore a shorter-than-usual skirt that showed of her Amazonian legs. Everything about Alex was addicting and arousing. She would probably always be horny too if she didn't spend an equal amount of time focused on cases as she did thinking about Alex. If she had spent so much time thinking about and getting aroused by Alex and Alex spent more time than that, Olivia could only imagine how sexually frustrated she must feel. She wasn't quite sure how she felt; on one hand she felt a great deal of satisfaction and pride at knowing how crazy she'd made Alex, but on the other she also felt kind of guilty for just how crazy she'd made her. Not knowing what else to say, she stammered, "I- Alex, I'm sorry. I d-didn't realize you were feeling so- so pent up."

Alex's eyes narrowed. If those blue eyes weren't mostly filled with carnal hunger, she might look threatening, but Olivia still gulped nervously. "Oh you should be sorry," she growled, stepping closer into the room until she stood at the foot of the bed. Olivia's heart raced at the closer proximity. Uncontrollably, her eyes kept flicking down to Alex's half-covered chest, hoping to catch more of a glimpse at her breasts, and back up to her eyes. "But you want to know something?" Alex questioned.

Olivia nodded jerkily, "What?"

Liv's heart nearly stopped and her breath caught in her throat as Alex climbed onto the bed on all fours and crawled over and up her body. Olivia watched with wide eyes as Alex straddled her and didn't stop crawling until she was holding herself up and looking straight down into Liv's eyes. The jacket parted and tickled Liv's ribs, causing Liv to gasp as she caught a better glimpse of Alex's breasts. Her nipples were erect with arousal. Olivia felt her own nipples tighten as she looked back into Alex's predatory eyes, awaiting her answer. Alex leaned down, being sure not to touch any part of Liv's body just yet, and whispered in her ear, "You're going to make it up to me."

The words dripped with sex. Olivia gasped involuntarily and shivered. Her body shook with nervousness and arousal. But she fought to stay in reality. She was tied up against her will. She was one who preferred to be the dominate one whenever she was with a woman. She hadn't given Alex permission to do this. She knew this should feel very, very wrong. There was a part of her that protested against this wholeheartedly, the part of her that was a sex crimes detective who usually told women that this kind of behavior wasn't okay. But there was a whole other part of her that was so incredibly aroused by this that it wanted more, to find out what would come next, find out whatever Alex decided to do to her. Fighting against that part of her, she did her best to glare as Alex pushed herself back up. "Oh really?" she asked harshly, "I don't think so Alex. Not like this. Maybe once you untie me-"

She broke off when Alex's look turned hard. "Let's get one thing straight Detective Benson," she spoke like she would to a perp and his scummy lawyer, "I wasn't asking for your permission." With that, before Olivia could respond, Alex's mouth latched on to Olivia's neck and began to suck and bite.

"Fuck!" Liv gasped as Alex marked her. Her back arched uncontrollably when Alex's hands grabbed on to her breasts and started to squeeze them. She didn't know what to do. She started to panic again and pulled against her restraints. The mixture of pleasure and pain was short circuiting her brain. "A-Alex," she choked out, "S-stop! Let- let me go!"

"No," Alex said simply against her throat. She tweaked Liv's nipples with her fingers causing Liv to whimper. Alex ran her tongue down the rest of the column of Liv's throat and continued until she reached a gloriously erect, dark nipple. She flicked it as she looked up at Liv. Olivia's eyes were wide as she watched. Alex could see the war between pleasure and sexual need and the need to hold on to reality taking place inside Liv. She was determined to make it so the previous one won. Slowly, she wrapped her mouth around as much of Liv's breast as she could, sucking it deeper into her mouth and continuing to tease her nipple with the tip of her tongue. She was satisfied when Liv whimpered. She pulled away just enough so Liv's breast would slide slowly out of her mouth. Olivia's breathing was heavy and shallow by now, the battle in her eyes fading more and more with each passing second. Just before Liv's breast could pop out of Alex's mouth, she caught the nipple in her teeth.

"Shit!" Olivia gasped. When Alex bit on it gently before swirling her tongue around it, Olivia moaned, "Alex! Christ!"

Alex released that nipple so she could repeat her process on her other breast. Olivia continued to gasp and shake under her. Alex could see that desire and pleasure were winning out against all else. Her own core was throbbing and weeping with arousal, but she was determined to make it so Olivia was the first one to come. When Olivia felt Alex's fingertips glide down her stomach to her core, she held her breath. Alex gently swirled her fingers around Olivia's mound, just barely touching the outside of her folds and completely avoiding going between them. Liv jerked her hips, but Alex pulled her hand away and shook her head, giving Liv a teasing look. For several more minutes, Alex tortured Liv by ghosting her fingers around her core and teasing her nipple with her tongue and teeth. She pulled against the cuffs, not really sure if she was trying to get away or trying to reach for Alex's hand and force it to her. She thrusted her hips again and Alex again took her hand away. Finally, she no longer cared how she'd ended up here; all she wanted was for Alex to take her, to pleasure her and make her come. She moaned in frustration, "Alex!"

"Yes Liv?" Alex asked sweetly around her breast.

"Please!" she gasped, arching her body beseechingly.

Alex released her nipple with a pop and looked down at her with faux innocence. "Please what?" she asked.

Before she could think about the repercussions, she shouted her plea, "Please fuck me!"

Alex hummed with a smile. "With pleasure my beauty." With that, she captured Olivia's lips in a searing kiss. Liv moaned into her mouth and responded with as much passion as she was getting. The kiss only served to make both of them hotter; they panted and groaned into each other's mouths. Finally, Alex roughly cupped Liv core. Olivia ripped her mouth from Alex's to shout, "Shit Alex!" as her hips jerked. Alex slid one finger between her folds, pleased when she found Liv completely soaked. She knew if she were to look, she would find a growing wet spot under Liv's ass she was so wet. Olivia threw her head back with a loud groan. "Please Alex. I need you inside me," she begged.

Alex grinned widely. "I'm still in charge here Liv," she taunted. At Liv's whimper of protest, Alex chuckled, "But since I absolutely love you begging, I'll acquiesce to your request." As she finished, she began to slowly slide two fingers into Liv's opening.

Olivia moaned and arched her back, "Yes! Alex! Yes!"

Encouraged, Alex started to pump her fingers, nice and slow, feeling every centimeter of Liv's silky, warm, juicy insides. Olivia was very vocal about her approval which Alex adored; she'd always imagined Liv would be a loud lover. After a few moments, Alex sped up. More expletives fell from Liv's tongue. She tried to widen her legs as much as she could with the ropes so she could take more of Alex in. Her hips shook, her head arched back. "Harder Alex!" she gasped. She screeched at the sharp pain at the base of her neck as Alex bit her.

"I'm in charge Liv," she growled again. Olivia protested with a groan, desperately wanting Alex's fingers to move harder against her. Alex kissed where she'd just bitten and continued at that pace. When Liv's inner muscles began to twitch, she knew that Liv was getting closer. She shifted so she could hold herself up and thrust her own hips against her hand, pushing her fingers deeper into Liv. Olivia shrieked with delight as Alex's fingers pressed on her g-spot. "Oh you like that?" Alex whispered in her ear as she repeated her action. Olivia shouted again, her back arching. "Answer me Olivia!" Alex growled, thrusting again.

"Ah! Fuck! Yes!" she gasped. "Yes Alex! More! Please!"

"Good!" Alex purred. "I'll give you more if you promise to ask my permission before you come. Can you do that Liv?"

Olivia moaned, "Yes. I can do that!"

"And if you scream my name. Will you do that Liv? Will you scream my name when you come?"

Olivia shivered and gasped, "Fuck! Yes! Yes, I will!"

"Good girl." Alex rewarded Olivia by repeatedly thrusting her hips and curling her fingers just so she would keep stroking Liv's g-spot. She bit down gently on Liv's shoulder to keep herself grounded as the thrusts were causing her to rub her own swollen clit on the back of her hand. Olivia's constant moaning and cursing were just as intoxicating, but Alex forced her orgasm back until she knew Liv came first. Uncontrollably, she started moving her hips with her all might.

Olivia screamed wordlessly in pleasure. Her back arched. Alex could feel her muscles squeezing tighter and tighter. "Alex!" Olivia cried, "Alex! I'm gonna come! Please can I come?"

Alex's hip jerked uncontrollably now. "Yes!" she gasped, "Yes Liv come!"

With that, Olivia's muscles clamped around Alex's fingers, her back arched as far as it would go, and she screamed, "ALEXANDRA!"

Hearing Liv's scream of her full name, instead of pissing her off like it usually did when people called her that, went straight to her core in the most pleasurable way and she cried, "Olivia!" as she too came. Her pelvis continued to jerk to draw out their orgasms as long as possible before Alex sagged and nearly collapsed onto Liv. Liv melted into the bed as she panted, trying to come down from that powerful orgasm. For a few moments, Alex rested her forehead against Liv's shoulder, her fingers still deep inside the detective. When she could breathe almost normally, she moved to take Liv in a sweet kiss. Liv sighed as she responded. Their tongues wrestled lazily. Then Alex moved, causing her hand to move against Liv's core. She gasped, starting to feel aroused all over again. Alex smiled, feeling the same, and kissed Liv even more hungrily. Soon she pulled away to look down at Liv with a teasing smile, "You didn't think I was done with you did you?"

"I hoped you weren't," Olivia admitted, realizing it was true after saying it.

Alex's smile widened and she kissed Olivia again. Her hand that wasn't inside Liv grabbed onto one breast and massaged it, eliciting a soft moan. After a few more moments of making out, Alex pulled away to begin kissing, licking, and nibbling down Olivia's body. Her jaw, her ear lobe, her neck, her collarbone, across one breast then the other, down her ripped stomach. All the while, Olivia's breath began to quicken and her body began to shake. Alex kissed first one protruding hip bone then the other. Olivia held her breath as Alex moved closer and closer to her center. She shook with anticipation as Alex leaned in closer, never breaking contact between their eyes. Then, with a taunting smirk, Alex changed direction at the last second and kissed her inside of her thigh. Liv whined in protest, "Alex!"

Alex grinned and kissed her other thigh before looking to Liv's core. It was still wrapped around Alex's fingers, wetness seeping out between them and flowing to the bed beneath her. Alex licked her lips. Wanting to taste Olivia, Alex pumped her fingers a few times to prompt more juice to leak before gently pulling them out. Liv moaned, first in protest then arousal as she watched Alex lift her hand to her mouth. Blue eyes capture brown as she slowly running her tongue up her fingers. At the taste of Liv, Alex moaned and sucked on her fingers to get every last drop. Liv's body twitched, and she pulled against the cuffs. Alex released her fingers and leaned in closer to Liv's core. She flicked her tongue out and ran it slowly between her folds. Olivia whimpered. Alex swirled the taste around her mouth before swallowing it. Her self-control snapped and she began to devour Olivia's core. Olivia shouted, throwing her head back. She pulled against her cuffs harder, desperately wanting to grab onto Alex's hair to push her even harder against her. Alex latched her mouth around Liv's mound, swirling her tongue around her clit and opening. Olivia panted and moaned as her hips began to jerk. Alex returned her hand to Liv's opening and pushed in with two fingers. "Fuck Alex!" Liv groaned. As Alex began to pump her fingers, she teased Liv's clit with her tongue. Olivia's hips jerked even more as her head shook from side to side and she continued to vocalize her pleasure. Alex pumped her fingers deeper and curled them so she kept hitting Liv's g-spot. "Oh my God! Oh Alex! I'm so close!" she moaned. Alex stopped her pumps only so she could rapidly massage her g-spot as her tongue pressed harder and swirled faster around her clit. "FUCK!" she shouted. "I'm coming! Oh Alex! I'm- ALEXANDRA!" she screamed Alex's full name again as she came. Her back arched; her muscles squeezed Alex's fingers, preventing them from moving anymore; her juices oozed. Alex delighted in the sound of her full name and couldn't help but moan. As soon as she felt Liv's muscles loosen ever so slightly, she quickly curled her fingers and swirled her tongue again. Olivia screamed her full name even louder as another, more powerful orgasm overcame her and even more viscous juices flowed out of Liv, soaking Alex's hand and splashing her tongue.

Alex watched Olivia's body in the throes of passion until it sagged and her muscles relaxed. Then she gently removed her fingers and once again sucked and licked Liv's juices from her hand. While Liv panted, Alex slowly lapped the rest of her nectar from her folds. She hummed and reluctantly pulled away. She didn't think she'd ever have enough of Liv's taste. She sat back on her heels and rubbed Liv's thighs as she watched her recover. She was starting to worry about whether Liv would be pissed at her for all this, if she'd regret it and never speak to Alex again. She wondered what she could possibly say to Olivia about everything she'd done, everything that had happened. Soon, Liv returned to Earth and felt Alex watching her. She looked to her. She could see Alex watching her warily and smiled lazily. "Kiss me?" she requested.

Alex smiled and wasted no time in pressing her lips to Liv's despite her growing fear and guilt. Liv ran her tongue across Alex's bottom lip, asking permission to get inside and taste herself on Alex. Alex granted her that and Liv hummed, "I taste so good on your lips." Alex gasped and she was suddenly reminded of her needy core. She moved her hand to cup herself and rubbed a fingertip on her hard clit. She whimpered and accidentally bit down on Liv's lip. Olivia tried to look down but could only see Alex's bent elbow pointing between her legs. She groaned and yanked her cuffed hands. "Alex. Please un-cuff me," she begged, looking into Alex's eyes imploringly, "Let me touch you. Let me make you come."

Alex's hand froze, and she fell silent for a minute. "You… You won't leave?" she asked so quietly that Olivia almost missed it.

Olivia shook her head vehemently. Leaving was the last thing on her mind; it hadn't even occurred to her. "I promise you. I want to be nowhere else but here, making you come screaming my name," she said honestly.

Alex searched Liv's eyes for a few more moments then, when she saw Liv wasn't lying, nodded and reached for the key, which she had left in the bedside table. She winced slightly when she saw Olivia's wrists were red and chaffed but un-cuffed her silently. Then moved to undo the ropes tying her ankles down. As soon as Alex had freed her, Olivia sat up, grabbed Alex, and pulled their bodies together as she spun them so she was on top. She pressed her thigh against Alex's core, making Alex moan. She knew instinctively that Alex was already close; her wetness layered on Liv's thigh. Wasting no time, she slid her hands down Alex's body and moved so she was positioned over Alex's center. She inhaled the smell of the blonde's arousal and licked her lips. She grabbed Alex's knees and forced her legs farther apart. She leaned in and looked up. When she saw Alex was staring at the ceiling, she begged, "Alex. Please look at me."

Alex did, her blue eyes locking onto Olivia's, shivering when she saw they were nearly black with need. That was all it took for Liv to lean in the rest of the way and feast from her. Alex cried out and moaned. Olivia had the most talented tongue in world Alex decided as she felt her orgasm building quickly. Olivia sucked her clit, flicked it, and rolled it between her teeth. "Liv!" Alex gasped, "In- inside! Please!" Liv gladly moved her fingers to Alex's entrance and pushed inside. It only took a few pumps of her fingers and flicks of her tongue before Alex arched her back, her eyes squeezed shut, her head fell back, and she cried, "OLIVIA!"

Olivia leisurely swirled her tongue to draw out Alex's orgasm until the blonde finally collapsed back onto the bed. She slowly pulled out and licked her hand clean of Alex's delicious nectar before licking her center clean as well. She licked her lips just to make sure she'd swallowed all of her juices as she moved to lay down next to Alex. Alex watched through heavy-lidded eyelids as Liv smiled at her and started to stroke her fingers up and down her torso. Alex gasped whenever Liv would ghost her finger over her nipples and breast.

Finally, Alex's breathing returned to normal and tears of guilt and fear formed in her eyes. Olivia noticed and wrapped her arm around Alex's waist, pulling them closer. "Hey," she whispered, "Don't cry baby. It's okay." Alex rolled onto her side and hid her face in Liv's neck as she fought against sobbing. Olivia hugged her tight and stroked her back. "It's okay Alex," she repeated.

"No, it's not," Alex choked out, "I crossed a line and now you're going to leave and never speak to me again."

Olivia gently pulled away and said, "Hey. Look at me." When Alex looked at her face, she said, "I'm not going to leave. What I said before was true. I don't want to be anywhere but with you."

"But, after what I did-" Alex begun to move away from her.

Liv gripped tighter onto Alex and shrugged, "Doesn't matter."

Alex looked at her disbelievingly, "It doesn't matter? How the hell can it not matter Olivia? I slipped sleeping pills into your drink. I forced you to fall asleep so I could drag you in here and cuff you to my bed. You told me to let you go, but you just looked so gorgeous and I've wanted you for so long and I didn't listen. I was so consumed by my lust that I took you anyway. Did you even want me? Did you even like it? We of all people know that, even while being raped, some people orgasm anyway. And look at your wrists! I hurt you! Oh God! I hurt you!" Alex grew frantic and shot off the bed, grabbing tightly onto her own hair and tugging it. "You didn't give me permission. I deceived you. I tied you down. You told me to let you go and I didn't! I RAPED you Olivia! Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!"

Olivia quickly stood up and grabbed Alex's wrists to stop to her from ripping out her hair and hurting herself. Alex's panicky eyes looked at her and Liv's heart nearly broke. "Alex. I did want it. I've wanted you since we met."

"Then why did you never say or do anything?" Alex shook her head.

"I guess I was afraid. You know how I can be with emotions. I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you."

"I'm sorry Liv," Alex's eyes once again filled with tears. "I love you. I never should have done this. I betrayed you; I hurt you; I raped you. I'm sorry."

"No. You didn't do anything of those things." Olivia softly brushed Alex's hair behind her ear and gently gripped her neck to keep her still as she rested their foreheads together. At a whisper, she shakily admitted all that she had realized, "I love you too Alex. I always have. But I would've forced it away, I would've forced you away because I'm such a coward when it comes to feelings. And then I would've lost you and it would've been the stupidest, most painful thing I could have ever done. I would've regretted it more than anything I've ever done and still might not have done anything about it. And you probably would've found someone to settle down with, someone to love you and who deserves you." She stepped closer to Alex, pleased when she didn't try to move away as she listened to Olivia's confession, stunned. Liv brought her other hand up to stroke her cheek and went on, "Truth is, I'm so glad that you did this, so relieved. Because now I know that being with you is purely and simply amazing. That was the greatest sex I've ever had because I had it with you. If you hadn't done this, I wouldn't know that my fears were completely unfounded and incredibly stupid. I wouldn't know how much I love you and how much I want to be with you- that I CAN be with you. Sure, I'm still kind of scared, but I'm willing to try to do this. Are you?"

For a moment, Alex was still in her shocked silence. Her mind repeated Olivia's words. She allowed them to sink in and comfort her. She felt her own fear shrinking as Olivia's hopeful brown eyes stared back at her. She could see nothing but honesty and love in them. She wrapped her arms around Liv's shoulders. Just to be sure, she questioned, "You sure you don't hate me or feel like I violated you?"

"I'm sure." Olivia kissed her forehead making Alex sigh.

Feeling reassured, Alex nodded, "Yes."

"Yes…?" Liv implored.

"Yes, I'm willing to do this, to be with you. I love you."

Olivia grinned happily. "I love you too Alex," she said before kissing Alex. Alex responded with as much love as she was getting until they pulled away again. "Let's go back to bed," Liv whispered in Alex's ear.

Alex shivered and smiled. "I have a better idea," she said, "Let's go take a shower."

"Ooo!" Liv's eyes widened, "I like that! You are a genius!"

Alex laughed and took Olivia's hand as she started to pull her to the bathroom, "Of course I am!"

"Mmm. A confident woman. I like it," she chuckled as she smacked Alex's ass, making her jump and squeal.

Alex pulled Liv into her and growled, "You're going to pay for that."

Olivia moaned and said, "Oh, I hope so." With that Alex growled again and pulled her into the bathroom, already planning the whole rest of the weekend in her mind.


End file.
